Ok, so you’ve happened to have fallen in love with a married man. Even the most gentle, thoughtful woman may have found themselves in this predicament in the past through no fault of her own. They were told that the marriage was over, the divorce was being finalised or he and his wife were going through a separation. Whatever the reasons there will be heartache, a pummeling of your self-esteem and your confidence will take a battering. Here is a list of reasons why a relationship with a married man will hurt you, and whilst you look at the list, try and think of what the alternatives could be:
You will only be able to text.
You will be ignored at the main holiday events.
You will not be able to ring them when you want.
You will be at the back of their list of priorities.
They will not be concerned if you’re lonely, and sometimes you’ll definitely need a cuddle and you’ll be alone.
You will give them something to do when they are bored.
They will forget to buy you a little something at the important times of the year. Their family is a more important to them.
You will feel inadequate and bitter, but you should feel valued and content.
You will constantly compare yourself to the other woman and feel horrid about yourself.
You will be deceived and made to feel stupid, yet you’ll want to feel more in control. The man will be in control of the relationship because he’ll decide the pace it moves at.
There will be no commitment.
He won’t take you for a weekend away, he’ll need to clear it with his wife first.
When their wife is out of the house they will ring you. There’s no one to hide from.
You will feel used and no matter what you do for them or how kindly you treat them it will never be enough.
Their wife will come first. They’re living with them, aren’t they?
No matter what they say about there being no intimacy in the relationship, there is. If he doesn’t want his wife to know about you there is definitely something going on.
You may be viewed by his friends as a homewrecker. Don’t let yourself be viewed in that way, it’s degrading.
They will always make excuses for why this happened or why that happened, and will often stumble when trying to talk and explain things in case you catch them out.
There will be significant times in your life when you need their help and support. You’ll have a dead phone line to listen to if you’re brave enough to ring in the first place!
You will constantly question your value as a woman. You may feel ugly, fat or stupid etc. This is because you are his bit on the side. His wife is his priority.
He may tell you that he loves you very much and it’s only a matter of time. These are just words. True love is a motivating force for good and instills confidence in the recipient. You will always doubt a term of endearment when no action accompanies it.
This post is not intended for you to just dump the man you may love. It just highlights the pain and anxiety that you will experience if you enter a relationship willingly like this. It will be fraught with emotional heartache and desperation. Everyone deserves a relationship that is calm, happy and peaceful x
PS… I’ll do a positive one about love tomorrow xx